Frozen

The movie Frozen is the perfect description of how people with insecurities and depressions are.

I don't know how to explain, but it just is.

It's amazing how the movie elicits everything and how much love can change people. 

My dear

The saddest way to fall out of love is to suddenly wake up the next morning, and realise that you don't feel the same way as you did the day before.

Two lovers starts to feel distant and little did they know, they were parting from each other, emotionally. 

Both are not capable of being in each other's company.

All of a sudden, the feeling that was once so true, turned out to be a lie.

What happened, dear Princess?

Just suckish

It sucks:

When you get to know someone close enough, but never realised you've actually fallen for him and only realised when he said he already liked some other girl.

Even worse:

When both of you fall for each other, but you just fail to tell the other person because you thought of waiting for the right moment and end up not saying anything.

The worst:

Both of you just ponder upon the past and wish that you've at least done something to be in each other's lives because now it's just seeing shadows of something that could've happened.

And it sucks.

How do you deal with someone who says no to all that you like?

How can you feel happy when the things you like are being pushed aside and not shared? Isn't love all about sharing?

Familiarity

Human likes the feeling of familiarity. They like to be sure of things. I guess that's why we find ourselves reminiscing the past because the feelings were true and you know that you've felt it before. 

It's not actually a good thing, but sometimes it's just hard to stop yourself. You just need to be sure that such feelings exist - such memories can be created. And then you just find yourself digging up old stuffs, flashing through all the good times in the past. 

Sometimes it's not because the present sucks. It's just the warm feeling we get from the past feelings keep us sane and hoping. The present just seems so confusing, and the only place to turn to is somewhere we know we'll never get lost - the past, of course.

Drowning yourself in the familiar faces can be both intriguing and bitter. Words never said could keep on hunting you, yet smiles on people's faces could light up your own. :)

I hate how much I rely on the past to feel familiar. I'm constantly searching for a place where I feel safe and warm. And I chose the past, and believe me, it's the biggest mistake yet. I just hope I find a better place to turn to later. The past is just not the place I wanna be anymore. 

A strong heart

I know I've mentioned about how much I hate sleeping late, but I just can't help it. I hate sleeping late, but lately I couldn't get myself to sleep early.

Why am I doing this to myself?

What has happened to me? I miss my old self.

I guess everyone will change, and lose themselves in the middle of the way, and hate the fact that they changed. And wish that they were how they were before. But there's nothing we can get from looking back on the person we used to be.

Haih.

I have such a strong heart, carrying all these nonsense burden.

I have a strong mind, keeping me sane.

Maybe I should be thankful for that.

Not enough

I just want to believe I'm good enough.

In everything I do, say or even the way I present myself. I wanna know that I'm enough.

How do I know when to stop trying?

Trying is sickening.

I try to be better but I'm barely moving.

I see people, and I see they impress you.

How do I impress you?

How do I leave a mark in your heart, in your mind?

How do I make you not fall for someone else?

How do I win?

When do I have to stop trying? 

What should I do to make you notice me?

Sometimes I give up on myself. 

Regardless of what you say, I give up.

I just know that I'm never gonna be enough.

Butterfly.

I hate how much I don't believe in myself.

There's always something not enough about myself. I know that somehow can be a good thing; it means we should be pushing ourselves a bit harder to be better. 

But most of the times it drives me the opposite way. I came to hate myself even more. I want to believe that I am so much better than some people and that I can always be better, but I fail every time.

I envy those who are just confident with themselves and can put themselves in public without any hesitation. 

Haih.

I'm good, right? I mean, what else could I ask for? Well, that's a stupid question; I could always ask for more. But.. Haih. Meia Meia. -,-

My stop.

There's a difference between tolerating and just giving in. 

Once you've given up, you don't even care anymore.

Do what ever, I'll please you, as long as I don't go thru all the crappy things I hate.

I hate fighting, so I'll just say yes to everything.

I hate the arguments, so I'll just stop at your points.

Too random to even give a title

I hate how every time I get in front of the computer, my thoughts all just fly away. Like it's too shy to be here. Too afraid to be share whats in it.
I hate it!
 Whenever I'm driving or eating or even in the toilet, ideas are like fireworks - BOOM BOOM BOOM!

*sigh*

My heart has been aching for so long.
I don't know what's hurting it so much; I don't know if it's other people or just myself.
And lately I've been getting less and less sleep, which is really bothering and getting on my nerves. I hate sleeping late. I like to sleep early, knowing that I have plenty of time for rest. I need rest. I need to rest my brain, my heart. It's just been working more than ever. I've been getting mild headaches the past few weeks and I swear, I'd bang my head real hard if I didn't wish to live any longer, which is actually what I wish for, but sane enough not to do.

I try to not think about things, but it just gets worse after some time and I have to face with it with double the tense.

My problem is, when people ask me what can they do to make things better, I just don't know what. I seriously don't know. I get mad over simple things and people just don't get why. Even I don't know why, for God's sake. I hate myself so much, I wish I had a reset button so I can just get over myself every time I have failed myself. Gosh.

Failing sucks. It's frustrating. I know people say, if you fail, you get up stronger than you were before. But before you can even get up, you've got to go through all the shitty 'I wish I was better than this' speech.

Huargh!

Dancing with a leaf.

Sometimes you just need a getaway. You'll see all the great things around you immediately. Even the smallest thing can make you happy. :) I'm just right now thankful for all the great people that are around me. 

I wanna write. I wanna write so badly.

But I just can't get anything out.

Heartbreaks

Every once in a while, I wish I was a cat. I can just go snuggle up to anyone and just purr my way to sleep. Or at least I can just sleep anywhere I want. And not give a damn of the things happening around me.

We all go through hard times, but it'll pass.

Instead of indulging yourself in the memories of the past, maybe it's time to invest in the future. Start creating new ones. Memories will eventually fade, so just keep looking forward. 

Everyone will get over things. And everyone will find another thing to look forward to. It's just a matter of time. Some people take longer than others.

Games

I think we all should know when to stop.

We can never be in control of a game forever.

You either stop now, or be prepare to lose it all.

I don't like how you're playing your games. 

I'm not hoping for the worst for you, but I hope you learn well.

One cent

If you live to others recognition, then be it. I don't want to compete in that competition for I know there is nothing about me that can be 'sold' to the public eyes.

I am very insecure, and I am pleased to know that you are very confident of yourself. But that does not mean you are liked and loved by many. Nor does it mean you are more than what you are.

Fear not, I am nothing close to even feeling envious of your success, for I know you are not even close to happy with what you are now. You are just pretentious and so desperate. Why should I compare myself to such centless piece?

Just be gone.

My, oh my! Did I miss November?

It's already December. That fast? Only 28 days left for 2014. I'm not sure I'm ready for that.

Have I ever been ready for a new year anyway? -,-

December. It's gonna be a short one, I can tell. I'm just hoping it'd be good.

I wish I can kill people. So that when a new year comes, I don't have to face all the people I hate anymore. I'd be free from all of the hatred and stupidity.

Or, if the people suddenly vanish, yeah. That'd work too. Whichever. As long as they are gone. 

The best

Why are you competing? 

What do you get at the end of the day? 

Satisfaction of having people talk about how lucky you are? Is that your satisfaction? Seriously? You get your friends to praise you and tell you how lucky you are, and you feel lifted?

I don't get how you steer your life. And I'm not in any position trying to judge you on how you live your life, but you are pathetic. 

I just really want to know what drives you to live your life. What are the intentions of your actions? Because all I see is just envious bitches backfiring one another. 

What is it to be proud of? What do you have, that other people don't? 

You just happen to have it better, but I guess you forgot, some people have the best.

And you don't see them bragging about it.

Why?

Because they know that things that last forever don't need to be told again and again. They stay and the whole world can see it for themselves. They don't need any kind of 'evidence' or recognition.