Obligation

I hate how social media nowadays are making it seem like it is an obligation for a person to have a connection to another person. I mean, if you decide to follow a person, you can't expect the person to do the same for you. So you want to have a connection to that person, do so. That other person may not feel the same way. 

I have my rights to deny that 'obligation'. It's stupid and just plain stupid. I can follow whomever I want, accept whatever requests, and you don't have a damn say in it. And you, you have your rights too. Don't be fooled by how the community works its way. You don't need other people to define you.

Xoxo, Meia Ameruddin

Just another torn apart post

Ah, totally torn apart. I hate this feeling. I'm not entirely sure I'm okay now, but I'm trying to live with it. Leaving a place that has given me not only memories, but peace, is gonna be so hard. *sigh* Although, in some way, I can't wait to be back and meet the people that I've missed so much! I can't deny that a part of me also can't wait to start the semester because it's just how I've lived my life. I've busied myself with assignments and hanging out with my friends.

I'd admit that I'm a homey kinda person. I feel so much safer and so much better just staying at home rather than have my ass out and about. Although, sometimes I do envy the times when my friends hangout and I'm there, at home, doing obviously nothing. -,- But I don't know why I won't let myself join them. I'm just such a creep. I like small companions and small groups of people where I feel familiar and safe. I guess I'm just a wuss. Anyways, besides all that, I do love to hangout with my friends. I'm just not a big crowd person (?) 

I hate changes. And this holiday definitely changed so much of my daily life. Having to go back to Malaysia, with all the classes and assignments, and activities, ergh. I can't even have the thought of facing it. It's pretty sad. 

Anywhores, you'll hear from me later, in Malaysia, hopefully.

Xoxo, Meia Ameruddin.

Sighing post

I've been feeling down lately. Not that things in my life are bad or anything. I just haven't been feeling like I'm living my life to the fullest. I feel like there's empty slots in my life, awaiting to be filled yet I'm not doing anything. *sigh*

 Lately I've been having lot's of thoughts about my study life. I just want to drop out of college and do things, you know? Like just travel or work. It's not that my degree life is that bad, no. I just feel like I need to free myself from the 'reality' world. I don't know. I don't know why suddenly the thought of starting a new semester scares me. Is it because that I'm in third year now? And my practical is only months away? *sigh* I don't know. 

Maybe it's also because I've had a long holiday here in Australia and I don't feel like going back to study. I mean, I miss Malaysia, but definitely not studying. -,- It made me think a lot, being here. There's so many things I wanna sort out. Despite me feeling all so negative, I try to live up the positive spirit in me so that I can go through the rest of my life in happiness. 

With that, I started a new hobby, sewing, obviously. Then I start planning things for the future. There's one thing that I super hate about planning ahead - FAILURE. Apparently when things don't go as I plan, I tend to take it to the heart and start feeling like I'm useless and there's no point of living now that everything I plan tend to fail. -,- Sad, but I'm just that sad person. Anyways, despite of that, I still plan because I believe in planning. 

So, plans for next semester:

1. GYM! I'm in serious need of exercise. My goal for next semester is 50 kg. Currently I'm 54 kg, thanks to Aussie, I fail to lose any fat. -,- Besides, gym takes my head off things. It's true, exercising is a stress reliever. 
2. Australia GOP in November. So there'll be a lot of money making activity. I hope so much we can make it in time. InsyaAllah. My teammates are good people with a lot of spirit!
3. IELTS. I need to start saving money for IELTS. I wanna be an exchange student this coming summer in Harvard, and for that I have to take my IELTS' test and also classes. So, I need heaps of money!
4. Indonesia. There's this practical thing in Indonesia and I plan to join the program and do half of my practical there.
5. Sew. I want to continue sewing and make a living out of it. Haha. 
6. Get  good grades. I think I've done enough damage with last semester's grade. It wasn't that awful, but it wasn't that pretty either. So, I need this semester to be super awesome so that I can get back on track with my grades. :)

Okay, so that's a lot right? -,- I hope I can get my schedule in line and my spirit on going. I'm such a vulnerable person. I tend to lose track of things I want and give up ever so easily. I need to change that attitude for good!At least I have a plan, so all I need is some determination! 

I can do this, InsyaAllah. Let's all have a great time. :)

Think positive thoughts and smile.

Xoxo, Meia

Just a little update

I have been homesick for quite some time now. -,- I can't believe that I can get this homesick. Haha. Maybe it's because of raya. And maybe because I gained so much weight that I can see myself getting wider. That is not funny btw. -,-

So, anyways, let's not get on with the negative vibes in this blogpost. I just wanted to recap some good times I've been having here and how raya is for me here. Oh, I've been sewing kinda aggressively too lately. I hurt my back sometimes. I guess that's just my body telling me to take some rest.

Look at that cutey boy in the middle. Haha. The one next to me in orange is Asma. She's taking her masters and graduating this December. On the next bench, from the left is Natasya. She just arrived a couple of weeks and she's studying for her masters as well. Next to her is my sister and next to my sister is kak Allina. If I'm not mistaken she's taking her masters.

:) This was after the solat raya. We decided to take some photos at the Nara Peace Park near the Embassy. This is how raya is spent here. Haha. Btw, it was freaking cold at the moment of the picture was taken! Freezing cold I tell ya. But for the sake of raya, we just pretended that it was all a-okay. xD

Me and my lovely sister. :)

Couldn't see the Malaysian flag, but this was at the embassy.

It was super windy!

I like this picture. :)

So, basically my first raya was just like that. Oh, in the evening I went to the Craft and Quilt Fair. xD Haha. A very good way to spend the first raya day I suppose. We went visiting on the weekend. So, yeah. It wasn't all that bad, but it wasn't home. :)

Last Saturday we went to the Aviary to feed birds. Oh, I love that place. Unfortunately the pictures are on my sisters phone so no pictures of that. Then we headed to the riverside at Cotter River and enjoyed the whole afternoon at peace. :)

Of course, my favourite person on earth, Muhammad Asyraf!

The bags me and my sister made. Mine is the one on the left. Hearts. Haha. So girlyyy. xD

And the sun was so bright yet it was so cold because it was windy! I put on so much weight. -,-

I'm working on a quilt right now. I'm taking so much time getting it done. Haih. And my hexies are still on the way and I'm telling ya, it's still a looong way to go. Hoping to get it done before I go back to Malaysia. The pictures are mostly on my Instagram because I take photos with my phone all the time. Anyway, I'm planning on making another blog just for my sewing projects. Haven't really thought of it because I might be busy when I get back to Malaysia, but I love sewing so much! And I hope I do have time to sew in Malaysia later. And now my instagram is filled with sewing projects. xD Haha. So, I guess that is all. Till next time, 

XOXO, Meia Ameruddin