How do you deal with someone who says no to all that you like?

How can you feel happy when the things you like are being pushed aside and not shared? Isn't love all about sharing?

Familiarity

Human likes the feeling of familiarity. They like to be sure of things. I guess that's why we find ourselves reminiscing the past because the feelings were true and you know that you've felt it before. 

It's not actually a good thing, but sometimes it's just hard to stop yourself. You just need to be sure that such feelings exist - such memories can be created. And then you just find yourself digging up old stuffs, flashing through all the good times in the past. 

Sometimes it's not because the present sucks. It's just the warm feeling we get from the past feelings keep us sane and hoping. The present just seems so confusing, and the only place to turn to is somewhere we know we'll never get lost - the past, of course.

Drowning yourself in the familiar faces can be both intriguing and bitter. Words never said could keep on hunting you, yet smiles on people's faces could light up your own. :)

I hate how much I rely on the past to feel familiar. I'm constantly searching for a place where I feel safe and warm. And I chose the past, and believe me, it's the biggest mistake yet. I just hope I find a better place to turn to later. The past is just not the place I wanna be anymore. 

A strong heart

I know I've mentioned about how much I hate sleeping late, but I just can't help it. I hate sleeping late, but lately I couldn't get myself to sleep early.

Why am I doing this to myself?

What has happened to me? I miss my old self.

I guess everyone will change, and lose themselves in the middle of the way, and hate the fact that they changed. And wish that they were how they were before. But there's nothing we can get from looking back on the person we used to be.

Haih.

I have such a strong heart, carrying all these nonsense burden.

I have a strong mind, keeping me sane.

Maybe I should be thankful for that.

Not enough

I just want to believe I'm good enough.

In everything I do, say or even the way I present myself. I wanna know that I'm enough.

How do I know when to stop trying?

Trying is sickening.

I try to be better but I'm barely moving.

I see people, and I see they impress you.

How do I impress you?

How do I leave a mark in your heart, in your mind?

How do I make you not fall for someone else?

How do I win?

When do I have to stop trying? 

What should I do to make you notice me?

Sometimes I give up on myself. 

Regardless of what you say, I give up.

I just know that I'm never gonna be enough.

Butterfly.

I hate how much I don't believe in myself.

There's always something not enough about myself. I know that somehow can be a good thing; it means we should be pushing ourselves a bit harder to be better. 

But most of the times it drives me the opposite way. I came to hate myself even more. I want to believe that I am so much better than some people and that I can always be better, but I fail every time.

I envy those who are just confident with themselves and can put themselves in public without any hesitation. 

Haih.

I'm good, right? I mean, what else could I ask for? Well, that's a stupid question; I could always ask for more. But.. Haih. Meia Meia. -,-

My stop.

There's a difference between tolerating and just giving in. 

Once you've given up, you don't even care anymore.

Do what ever, I'll please you, as long as I don't go thru all the crappy things I hate.

I hate fighting, so I'll just say yes to everything.

I hate the arguments, so I'll just stop at your points.

Too random to even give a title

I hate how every time I get in front of the computer, my thoughts all just fly away. Like it's too shy to be here. Too afraid to be share whats in it.
I hate it!
 Whenever I'm driving or eating or even in the toilet, ideas are like fireworks - BOOM BOOM BOOM!

*sigh*

My heart has been aching for so long.
I don't know what's hurting it so much; I don't know if it's other people or just myself.
And lately I've been getting less and less sleep, which is really bothering and getting on my nerves. I hate sleeping late. I like to sleep early, knowing that I have plenty of time for rest. I need rest. I need to rest my brain, my heart. It's just been working more than ever. I've been getting mild headaches the past few weeks and I swear, I'd bang my head real hard if I didn't wish to live any longer, which is actually what I wish for, but sane enough not to do.

I try to not think about things, but it just gets worse after some time and I have to face with it with double the tense.

My problem is, when people ask me what can they do to make things better, I just don't know what. I seriously don't know. I get mad over simple things and people just don't get why. Even I don't know why, for God's sake. I hate myself so much, I wish I had a reset button so I can just get over myself every time I have failed myself. Gosh.

Failing sucks. It's frustrating. I know people say, if you fail, you get up stronger than you were before. But before you can even get up, you've got to go through all the shitty 'I wish I was better than this' speech.

Huargh!